The Quick Brown Fox Jumps Over The Lazy Dog

Only in this case the fox is not a fox. Nor is it jumping. The dog is not lazy, he's just really dumb.

I've been sitting in my back yard for 50 minutes watching a chipmunk wreak havoc on my poor puppy's psyche. Gus is adorable. He's fast. He's full of joie de vivre. What he is not is smart. Not even a little bit. Gus has spent the summer patrolling the yard and protecting our weed filled vegetable gardens. No sneaky squirrels or rascally rabbits have made a poaching attempt and escaped alive. Countless dozens of field mice have met their demise in is crushing jaws. Now it seems, he has met his match.

Chipmunks are rare here. I saw them constantly growing up in the East and took the as a part of the scenery, but here in Colorado I have seen only a few. This chipmunk (assuming that's what he is and not Satan in a flesh suit) has been kicking Gus' ass up and down the yard. He feints left and right and runs circles around my dismayed doggie. He just ran Gus headlong into the Cottonwood.

I would expect him to run away, or sit in the tree chattering at Gus like the squirrels do, but he really seems to be enjoying it.

AND WE HAVE A WINNER! Gus has plopped down in the bushes and is staring at me like I have failed him. The chippie is crouched down to the ground (which is a given I suppose when your legs are a centimeter long) and surveying his newly won territory.

Now I ask myself: Should I have stepped in and chased the chipmunk off? I give Gus a hard time, but really, I think that this little beastie might have made me look stupid too. And I look stupid often enough as it is.

Really, the question I should be asking myself is: Don't I have anything better to do than watch a spectacle like this for an hour and then post a blog about it? Obviously. And obviously that is kind of the point.

Ciao.

Mirth Day...

While it has been quite a while, my proximity to Boulder and all of this Earth Day rigmarole has gotten me sucked into voicing an opinion that no one else will ever see.

I just got home from the grocery store and whilst unpacking my groceries (from my brought from home/reusable/made out of completely sustainable resources/able to re-grow acres of slash and burned rain forest grocery bag) I found a little pamphlet. I'm not even sure how it got in there, since I bagged my own groceries. They must have some seriously sneaky tactics for slipping them in under the radar. I need those skills.

I digress. The pamphlet is titled: because you care about the environment. I saw that and thought "HEY! I do care the environment. Let's see what those earth-friendly folks at my local branch of the super-huge almost but not quite a monopoly grocery store are offering me as a result..."

Actually, that's not true. I was being facetious. Really, I was just pissed off that they snuck one by me. I opened the little booklet and found twenty-eight pages of glossy, colored (read - hard to recycle into anything usable) advertisements and coupons for things like pre-packaged frozen meals, tampons, toothpaste and bottled water. Apparently all things that help to manage and reduce waste. Plus it gave me tips on how to be green at home by turning off the faucet when I brush my teeth. Good thing.

I don't even feel I need to elucidate. You understand or you don't. That is all.

Ciao

Snips and Snails and Puppy Dog Tails

That's what little boys are made of. I suppose that explains why they turn out the way they do once they're grown.

So I've been slightly out of the loop for a while. Since a while can cover anything from two weeks to (in this case) six months, I feel safe using that expression. I haven't been playing video games. I haven't been hanging out. I've pretty much been trying to figure out my life and feeling sorry for myself. I am done with all that. I'm going to lose my shit if I don't pick myself off and start dealing with things.

Anyhow. I just popped on to tell anyone who cares that I am still breathing. I need to hit the store and buckle down on some serious work at home. I will be sure to update you on how completely unsuccessful I was at that. The latter. I'm a ace at grocery shopping.

Ciao

I've been a little busy...

I've been really preoccupied with all the things happening in my life lately. I'll tell you all about it. I promise. Just not tonight. I'm tired, I've got some beer and really, I'd rather play online poker than post a blog. Tomorrow. Maybe.

I'm at home

I am home on a Saturday. I have done the unthinkable. I called in sick to work, when I wasn't really ill. This is pretty well unheard of in my sphere of influence.

Why did I do it? I'm tired. I have so many things that I'm trying to sort out in my life right now that I honestly couldn't face the day. Not that I've really been effectively using the time that I've gained. I slept until almost one o'clock. I wouldn't have gotten up then if it hadn't been for the fact that I was about to wet the bed. Then I played The Punisher for an hour. I would still be playing except that I seem to be stuck. I killed everyone I can find on the docks and have reached the crane I use to take out the boat, only the boat isn't there. I've walked the perimeter of every room in the level, and honestly don't know what to do now. Restarting the level doesn't seem to help. I ended up in exactly the same situation twice. Anyone?

Now, I'm writing a pointless blog that no one is going to read anyways and trying to decide if it is worth the effort to get dressed so that I can check my mail without getting arrested. It is gorgeous outside. I should be doing something with my purloined freedom. Anything.

I think I may take my homework and the other things that I should be doing down to the pool, where I still won't do them. Yeah, that sounds like a plan. I can check the mail on the way...

Ciao,
Veelzabub


THIS is what I should be doing on a perfect day like today! Even Joe and Greg are doing something fun.

Getting there

I've had a wired couple of days. I was feeling really sick and tired. Sick both physically and emotionally and tired of everything. So instead of trying to rush through and get everything done and sacrificing sleep, I just slept. I put everything on the back burner and lay in bed for fourteen hours.

It was b-e-a-utiful. I got more done in the few hours after I woke up than I would have in the entire day had I worked straight through. I'm really starting to relate to Shelley and I'll Think About That Tomorrow.

So, I'm off to get ready for work with a better attitude than I've had in a long time. Glengarry Leads just sent me an email which I'm hoping will have info about when he's coming to visit. God is mad at me again, for no reason (again). I called him yesterday and left him a message saying that I'm sorry if he took my IM message out of of context but that typed messages do that sometimes (considering I wasn't IMing him in the first place, it's kind of a gray area). He can get over it, or not. At this point, as much as I love him, I don't have the time, the energy or the desire to waste my time worrying about if what I say to him is going to set him off again. He needs to move back to California where he'll be happier. It's definitely not a solution, but if it will make him feel better, I'm all for it. There really doesn't seem to be anything I can do to help him at this point.

OK, now I really am off.

Ciao

-Veelzabub

One more thing

I know, I know. I am going to work, I just wanted to add this one in here...



It wasn't (as I had expected) a huge time suck and I like to think I'm doing my part to help out with higher education...

a quick note....

For anyone who wondered why I disappeared into a rip in the time/space continuum for the last four months, here is my big explanation...
3.767
Was it at least worth it you ask? Aren't I proud? No and No. Now having explained, I have to go back to work.

And this wasn't even a little bit tongue-in-cheek.