Absolute Morality

Yup, that's right. Absolute morality. That's what I'm writing a 5-7 page paper on. Well more specifically, on the fact that I don't believe in it. And also that I think Kant is a raging idiot. While it's true that I think lots of people are raging idiots (especially when I'm stuck behind them in traffic) this is the first time that I've decided that a Prussian philosopher from the 1700's was one. I guess I just find more in espousings of Nietzsche that I agree with; except of course for the uberman woman bashing part of course...

Anyhow, If you can't tell, once again I am putting off what I should be working on in order to talk to no one. Hey, it's good work if you can get it. Though technically this is the most long sighted procrastination ever. The paper isn't actually due until the 28th. However, since we were given absolutely no guidelines for it, I figure that it might be a good idea to for once follow through with the "strongly suggested" submission of a rough draft. Unfortunately, although I know exactly what I want to say, the drive just isn't happening. I have found out just how many times I can lose at solitare. So I'm going to finish this and then catch about 4 hours of sleep (if I'm lucky) and then get up and write a paper. I'm thrilled.

And I put my hamster in her little running ball....and then forgot about her....for 7 hours...
I'm a bad person, I know this...of course according to Nietzsche these mores are subjective and need to be constantly redefined. So I'm now going to reflect on what I've done, i.e. sleep and hope I can come up with a powerful reason why this is not a bad thing.

ah.

-Veelzabub

A Rodent Menagerie

I have a mouse. Not in the sense that I have pet gerbils or a hamster. There is a mouse loose in my house...in the kitchen to be exact.

It isn't that I don't like rodents. In cages, running around on their little wheels, I think they're great. (actually I pretty much feel the same about mr. bush, but that's another story) I do not however like them scurrying freely about in the same place that I prepare my food.

I was taking the stickers off the piece of a fixture I salvaged from work, planning on turning it into a plant holder when I saw something move out of the corner of my eye. For a moment I thought it was one of those weird tricks your peripheral vision sometimes plays on you. Then I saw again. Clearly. It was little, it was brown and it ran right under my pantry door. I sprinted after it but it was no where in sight. This would not stand.

I built a wall to rival anything China has ever produced. 12-packs of soda, potatoes and cans of soup blocked the rodent houdini's escape from the panty. I then proceeded to remove everything, one shelf at a time. I found things that they took off the market years ago. Safety shmaftey, it does say "best by" not do not eat after, am I right? Anyhow, the little poot was nowhere to be found. Then I heard it. A little squeak behind me. I slowly turned and there, on top of the water heater, staring me dead in the eye was my quarry. If you've never been faced down by a mouse, you don't understand how forbidding they can be, but regardless, he held my gaze. I realized then that despite having found the little monster, I had no idea what to do.

"I need something to trap him in..." Preferably something disposable. Thank god for the advent of tupperware! Plastic lunch container in hand, I prepared to catch the mouse. Plastic container in hand, I watched him shimmy down the wall next to the water heater and disappear. We are talking about a space maybe a 1/4 of an inch wide. I stood and stared. Buh-bye.

I went after him with a mag-lite and coat hanger, but the beast was gone. No sign of him, and no visible route of escape. I cannot figure out for the life of me where he went. Unless he's inside the water heater. This, while unlikely, is still possible.

So now, here I sit. I should be working, or doing homework, or various other things that need to be done. Instead, I sit. I can hear him in there. Waiting. Plotting. But I will have the last laugh. I will snare the beast if it takes me all night. I must.


"I do not like this stupid mouse. I do not like it in my house. I'd like to hit it with a mat, or better yet, a baseball bat...."

-Veelzabub

The Grand Opening of the House of Veelzabub

Well, here I am...It's 9:21 on a Friday night and I'm home alone and on the computer. Would this surprise anyone I know? Probably not. And if they were to express any astonishment at this fact, it would only be because normally I'm still at work. But tonight is different. Tonight I am sick.

I really am sick. I swear. I have been hacking up things so disgusting you don't even want to think about them. Occasionally a really good one will come up, looking somewhat like a cross between an ordinary garden slug and one of the creatures out of Heinlein's The Puppetmasters. All and all not the sort of things you want to imagine in your mouth, much less spit out.

I went to work (at my major conglomerate sporting goods store) and actually worked for about three hours. Of course, I was slightly limited by the fact that I would not let any customer get within four feet of me. I think of this as doing my civic duty, what with the lack of flu shots available and so forth. I must add though, if any of us had any decent health insurance this wouldn't be such a huge problem-thanks again for the help W. But I digress. After several hours of contributing my germ-ridden self to aid the approximate 4:1 employee to customer ratio, I asked if I could just go home. All I wanted to do was curl up in a little hacking ball and go to sleep. To make a long story just slightly shorter, they were pissed. "I guess so...." Let us remember that it Friday night and there are NO customers in the store. I ignored the Looney Toon daggers being shot at me and weezed a "bye" as I ran out the door. I did remember to punch out.

So now I'm at home. My bed has never been so comfortable, but despite that fact, I cannot sleep. You would think that the mighty dose of nyquil, coupled as it was with thera-flu (store brand, but hey, I'm broke) would have sent me into the drooling arms of unconciousness, but no such luck. I can't sleep. I have nowhere else to be, although I have plenty of other things I should be doing. All I can think about is that I have to be at a stupid store meeting at seven a.m.. It's some kind of pep rally for the holiday retail season. Great, I'm gonna feel really peppy at seven on a Saturday morning. I hope they all get sick.

Well, that's my life.
-Veelzabub